Going to California


Who: Me.
What: The title I gave to it was ‘Big Brother is Watching’.
When: June 1999.
Where: Rooftop of the condo I was residing at on Bay Street in downtown Toronto. Sitting on a chair facing westward and overlooking Queen’s Park. Life was good.
Why: In response to a phone conversation with my younger brother who was trying to figure out what to do with his life.
How: Pen in hand, writing in the book. With some cigarettes and a drink alternating in the other hand. I never did send it to him.

Return to Sender:

On growing up: You’re young, you’re going to make mistakes. Admit them and accept them. Have fun.

On big decisions: Every big decision in life you will have to leave something behind that you don’t want to. It could be a girl, car, truck, friends, etc. Most of these things will be gone temporarily if you stick with and believe in your decision.

On family: They will only get mad if they think you may not be going the right way according to their eyes. They should also respect your decisions even if they don’t agree with them. They want you to be happy.

On help: Unfortunately, without help you can only go so far. Suck in your pride and take it – what goes around comes around. Help will always come when you least expect it. Sometimes it won’t. There will come a time when you need to ask for it because you can’t hold out any longer.

On living each day: Wake up everyday and do little things that make your life better or happier. Eventually these add up and become habit and are better for you in the long term. Do something you like for a living, have fun, and good things will follow.

On friends: When they make mistakes, you try to help them. When they disappear and eventually return, you greet them like they were never gone. Expect the same from them that you would expect. If they are true friends they won’t let you down. Many people have no true friends.

On women: If you ever figure women out, let me know, because I haven’t. I suppose it’s a quality that brings us to love women (not knowing what’s up with them) besides other great qualities such as a pretty face and some nice tits too, etc. etc.

On success: This is a loose definition, defining it varies from person to person. It will change over years - try to keep up with your definition and only your definition.

On money: It’s only money, it’s not love. Money will always come, it will always go.

On health: Treat yourself to great food and drink, take care of your body. Without good health you’re very limited. You will hear this from people who get really sick and then recover, take it from them.

On fast times: Keep on going. But be sure to stop and look around every once in awhile to enjoy the view.

On bad times: We need these. Without bad, there would be no good. Everyone else has them in their own ways, and I feel these can make you stronger.

On building and burning bridges: Do your best to keep all your commitments and stay true to your word. The truth shall set you free. The truth should never hurt, but it does because most people aren’t honest with each other.

On giving up and perserverance: It is never too late to accomplish goals you have failed to reach. Most of the successful people in life have failed miserably and many times. Bouncing back and learning from the mistakes is what sets them apart from everyone else. Life is a game; you can start over whenever you want pretty much. If you’re going to lose one of these battles, go out with a bang and try your best. You still may lose the battle, but it’s a long war.

On travel: I recommend you do it if you can. Going places where you have no idea what’s in store for you should be fun and exciting - not frightening.

On music: Always play it when you get a chance – It’s the best drug in the world.

On intoxicating yourself: It’s good to get drunk and escape reality, but only on selected occasions.

On books: They’re free at the library, and buying one is the same as renting a movie or 2 in $. They’re much better than TV and you can also control what you read.

On negative people: Do what you want. There will always be people questioning you. It’s better to be the questioned than the one asking them when it comes to your life. Some people think and don’t act. Don’t be one of them. They judge things they haven’t tried. Don’t let these people get to you.

On the difference of one person; the individual: 1 person can cause so much damage (too many examples to list in history). 1 person can also stop all those things from happening and make a much bigger impact on humanity.

On brotherly advice: Throw it away, really. But if you want to know more about your brother and where he’s coming from, hear it. The best way to learn about anything is through your own experiences.