AN ODE TO THAT SAINT: VALENTINE

Flowers, chocolates, candlelight, dinners, poetry, and greeting cards.

If I ever saw a flower I liked I would pick it for you any day of the year.
If I ever craved chocolate, I'd buy some for you and we'd share.
When I crave a drink, we'll go out to dinner and I can have a beer.
If I ever wanted to get laid, I'd bring out the candles, dear.
(bad poetry above)
This is my greeting card to you, my Valentine.

I read an interesting article online this past week and it listed a bunch of traits for someone who is a stalker. I can joke about many things, but I honestly do not wish upon anyone to be a stalker or become stalked. Anyway, let's see how I fared (in brackets):

While not all stalkers are the same, most of them share some common traits:

* Obsessive personality (check)
* Above-average intelligence (check)
* Extreme emotional needs (n/a)
* Few personal relationships (check)
* May be delusional (check)
* Non-conformity to social norms (check)
* Low self-esteem (we are all vulnerable)
* Substance abuse (check)

Wow! Maybe my dream girl is a stalker! That would be so cool!

Now, for my entertainment, let's compare the above list to LOVE:

* Obsessive personality (Love is an obsession)
* Above-average intelligence (You are likely smart if you read this site)
* Extreme emotional needs (Is this love?)
* Few personal relationships (Monogamy)
* May be delusional (Love is blind)
* Non-conformity to social norms (Love is what YOU want it to be!)
* Low self-esteem (You shouldn't have settled)
* Substance abuse (How many times has he/she driven you to drink?)

Love is all you need. All you need is love.