Mercury seeping and feeling good and feeling blank and feeling great and feeling blank and can't think anymore and want to focus but can't focus because something or someone is stopping me as the thump in the head is there and waking up and blood is in the throat and the head hurts all day and the next day it is completely opposite and there is no telling why this is happening as you feel that you know what you have to do but somehow there is something or someone holding you back and you don't see where they are coming from and you don't admit it could be happening but it is and then you just keep on doing the same thing over and over again as the ears start ringing and you hear the water leaking and dripping in the pipes all around you in the house before you go outside and smell the gasoline fumes and then the mold and then you feel the damp air and feel like you should climb down the hole and into the underground and meet some ninja turtles.